"I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Yet it was good of you to share in my troubles." Philippians 4:11-14 (NIV)
Okay, so, look... This Paul guy is really throwing one at me here. This verse has been running through my head for several days now, but I have been hesitant to write it down... Hesitant because I don't know if I am ready to wrestle with it. And wrestle with it I will.
I am discovering something quite disturbing in myself. I would love to sing Paul's song, but an honest look in the mirror reflects something completely different. I am realizing that dissatisfaction, discontentment, restlessness, etc. these positions are a much more natural product of my DNA. This is bothersome. This makes me sad. I would like to learn to be content in every circumstance, but somehow it seems I have learned to be discontent in just about every circumstance.
Complacency terrifies me, but contentment I'd love to master. I am not sure, though, that I understand the difference. God teach me. God change me.
1 comment:
As a fellow malcontent, I get solace from the word - "learned." It does not say how long it took him to learn contentment.
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